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Erlkönig: wife-1-0.shtmlSubject: new program TROUBLE Original Message Name: Joe Screwed Date: August 13, 1999 at 14:45:57 Subject: new program TROUBLE | | Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 and noticed that the | new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space | and valuable resources. No mention of this phenomenon was included in the | product brochure. In addition, Wife 1.0 installs itself into all other | programs and launches during system initialisation, where it monitors all | other system activity. Applications such as Pokernight 10.3, Drunken Boys | Night 2.5 and Saturday Football 5.0 no longer run, crashing the system | whenever selected. I can not seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while | attempting to run some of my other favourite applications. I am thinking | about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but un-install does not work on this | program. Can you help me, please? Otherwise, I'm screwed. | | Thanks, Joe Response Number 1 Name: Techie Date: August 13, 1999 at 14:53:08 Subject: new program TROUBLE | | Dear Joe, | | This is a very common problem men complain about but is mostly due to a | primary misconception. Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 | with the idea that Wife 1.0 is merely a "UTILITIES & ENTERTAINMENT" | program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and designed by its creator to run | everything. It is unlikely you would be able to purge Wife 1.0 and still | convert back to Girlfriend 7.0. Hidden operating files within your system | would cause Girlfriend 7.0 to emulate Wife 1.0 so nothing is gained. It is | impossible to un-install, delete, or purge the program files from the | system once installed. You can not go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife | 1.0 is not designed to do this. Some have tried to install Girlfriend 8.0 | or Wife 2.0 but end up with more problems than the original system. Look | in your manual under "Warnings-Alimony /Child Support." | | I recommend you keep Wife 1.0 and just deal with the situation. Having Wife | 1.0 installed myself, I might also suggest you read the entire section | regarding General Partnership Faults (GPFs). You must assume all | responsibility for faults and problems that might occur, regardless of | their cause. The best course of action will be to enter the command | C:\APOLOGISE. In any case avoid excessive use of the "Esc" key because | ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGISE command before the operating | system will return to normal. The system will run smooth as long as you | take the blame for all the GPFs. | | Wife 1.0 is a great program, but very high maintenance. Consider buying | addition software to improve the performance of Wife 1.0. I recommend | Flowers 2.1 and Chocolates 5.0. Do not, under any circumstances, install | Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3. This is not a supported application for | Wife 1.0 and is likely to cause irreversible damage to the operating | system. | | Best of luck, Techie |