Erlkönig: sex-hooray.shtml

[collected 2002-11-18]

This used to be a silly Fwd (aren't you glad that you guys are BCCed?) with
lots of little bits about the "Hot Sex Fairy" and how she'd grant you all
of the best sex in the world if you just sent this to ten or so
people...but worse, how if you didn't, she'd have your loins
rot...eww...but I thought that I should chop it up and wish everyone out
there happy sex! Hey, even if this stuff isn't true, at least it sounds
true! And I was kind of hoping that it would be the thought that counts
anyway seeing as how I'm not sending this to anyone that I might personally
owe any sexual confirmation. But to all of you out there who I love well, I
wish you this...


1. Sex is a beauty treatment. Scientific tests find that when woman make
   love they produce amounts of the hormone estrogen, which make hair shiny
   and skin smooth.

2. Gentle, relaxed lovemaking reduces your chances of suffering dermatitis,
   skin rashes and blemishes. The sweat produced cleanses the pores and makes
   your skin glow.

3. Lovemaking can burn up those calories you piled on during that romantic
   dinner.

4. Sex is one of the safest sports you can take up. It stretches and tones
   up just about every muscle in the body. It's more enjoyable than swimming
   20 laps, and you don't need special sneakers!

5. Sex is an instant cure for mild depression. It releases the body
   endorphin into the bloodstream, producing a sense of euphoria and leaving
   you with a feeling of well-being.

6. The more sex you have, the more you will be offered. The sexually active
   body gives off greater quantities of chemicals called pheromones. These
   subtle sex perfumes drive the opposite sex crazy!

7. Sex is the safest tranquilizer in the world. IT IS 10 TIMES MORE
   EFFECTIVE THAN VALIUM.

8. Kissing each day will keep the dentist away. Kissing encourages saliva
   to wash food from the teeth and lowers the level of the acid that causes
   decay, preventing plaque build-up.

9. Sex actually relieves headaches. A lovemaking session can release the
   tension that restricts blood vessels in the brain.

10. A lot of lovemaking can unblock a stuffy nose. Sex is a national
    antihistamine. It can help combat asthma and hay fever.  Hooray for sex! :)