Erlkönig: Review: Juvenile felis catus

[collected 2003-08-09]

See full article at http://www.dansdata.com/kitten.htm

	Kitten	Puppy	Baby	New Video Card
Cute	Yes	Yes	Arguably	No
Furry	Yes (some exceptions)	Yes	No	No (assuming case dust filters are effective)
Buries own dung	Yes	No	No	N/A
Talks back	No	No	Eventually	No
Purrs	Yes	No	No	No (unless cooling fan bearings are failing)
Elegant	Yes	No	No	Arguably
Coordinated	Yes	No	No	N/A
Multiple rendering pipelines	No	No	No	Yes
Chases tail	Yes	Yes	No (some exceptions)	No
Can be shut up in kitchen overnight	Yes	Yes	Yes, until someone finds out	Sure, if you like
Smells bad	No	Sometimes	Often	No
Climbs screen doors	Yes	No	No	No
Likes to eat bugs	Yes	Yes	Yes	No

Number of favourable scores:	11	6	2	3

Clearly, and despite competing opinions, a kitten is substantially preferable to a puppy. It's also, incidentally, obvious that a new video card is 1.5 times as desirable as a baby.

In their favour, babies can be made at home and offer superior resale value.

The kitten, however, is obviously the better option.

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		Review: Juvenile felis catus