Erlkönig: clever-lawyer.shtml

A defendant in a lawsuit involving large sums of money was talking to his
lawyer.  "If I lose this case, I'll be ruined!"
"Well, It's ultimately in the judge's hand's," said the lawyer.
"Would it help if you sent the judge a box of cigars?"
"Oh no!" replied the lawyer.  "This judge is a stickler or ethical behavior.
A stunt like that would prejudice him against you.  He might even hold you
in contempt of court.  In fact, you shouldn't even smile at the judge."
Within the course of time, the judge rendered a decision in favor of the
defendant.  As the defendant left the courthouse, he said to his lawyer,
"Thanks for the tip about the cigars.  I'm sure we would have lost the case
if you'd sent them."
"But I did send them.  That's how we won the case."
"What?" gasped his client. "I don't understand!"
He shrugged, "I also enclosed the plaintiff's business card."