Erlkönig: camelot+chastity-belt.shtml

>CAMELOT & The Chastity Belt 
>
>  King Arthur was getting ready to go on a Quest. He was worried about
>leaving his beautiful Queen Guinevere alone with all those lonely knights of
>the Round Table. So he went to his famous wizard, Merlin, for some advice.
>
> After explaining his predicament to Merlin, the wizard looked thoughtful and
>said to come back in a week and he'd see if he could come up with something.
>A week later King Arthur was back in Merlin's laboratory where the good
>wizard was showing him his latest invention.
>
> It was a chastity belt... except it had a rather large hole in the most
>obvious place. "This is no good, Merlin!" the king exclaimed,
>
> "Look at this opening. How is this supposed to protect m'lady, the Queen?"
>
> "Ah, sire, just observe." said Merlin as he searched his cluttered workbench
>until he found what he was looking for.
>
> He then selected his most worn out wand, one that he was going to discard
>anyway. He then inserted it in the gaping aperture of the chastity belt where
>upon a small guillotine blade came down and cut it neatly in two.
>
> "Merlin, you are a genius!" said the grateful monarch, "Now I can leave,
>knowing that my Queen is fully protected." After putting Guinevere in the
>device, King Arthur then set out upon his Quest.
> 
> Several years passed until he returned to Camelot. Immediately he assembled
>all his knights in the courtyard and had them drop their trousers for an
>informal 'short arm' inspection.
> 
> Sure enough! Each and every one of them was either amputated or damaged in
>some way. All of them except Sir Galahadhis. "Sir Galahadhis," exclaimed King
>Arthur, "The one and only true knight! Only you among all the nobles have
been
>true to me.  What is it in my power to grant you? Name it and it is yours!"
>
> But Sir Galahadhis was speechless.
>